The shatters between our two worlds have taken place and by the stroke of midnight, it would be you who i face to live alone these days, making note of our endless ways. To have taken my white rose, it's now my heart that goes, broken and lost, the river continues to flow. It was once a smile that use to show, and now the passions of glory is what must go. What is a heart, that which we give love, would be questioned as broken to the one above? what is a man from a boy who is to be considered grown but doesn't know his actions when he leaves a WOMAN alone? My heart beats out of control with anger to know that all my next love hearts shall be in danger. I'm living with a broken heart and the pain is continuous like sharpened darts. The hurt is very clear to the eye can see, but now it's me, who must live this broken hearted world so freely. Let me remain so oblivious until the break of daw,n, looking to the heavens acknowledging his deal and know that my broken heart shall heal, because I now know the truth and that is for real.
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Parents! Everyone have them. I'm here to notify other people that don't believe this. Even if your parents did the things that mine did, they're still your parents and to further more this, your parents can also be a complete stranger to you and don't have to be blood or relation. I'm not ashame to admitt that my mother and father were complete addicts and that my mother relasped trying to get clean. I can admitt that my mother did leave her child unattended once,but did come back, but it was too late. I can admitt that I was adopted but love my mother for her struggle to get clean. If you are the type that have a lot of dreams, look and notice those dreams for they may be true. I dreamed that when I was taken from my mother that she used more than ever and that she blamed the whole world on the taken of her 7 children. TRUE! I have had recent dreams that is not plesent and made me cry so bad. Some about my mother and one about a lady named miss Jones that use to work at lavizzo school but was fired for coming in drunk. I had a dreamed that she was on drugs and it was difficult for her to face me and tell me that because I really cared about her and looked toward her as a mother. But my real mother today is in virgina and I'm in chicago and it hurts so bad because do u know how hard it is to talk to your mother about ANYTHING! well it isn't like that for me it is really diffferent. I can talk to her about boys, sex, and just troubles in my life. She would have been the best mother a child can have even if she couldnt provide for us. Mothers out there, if you think your child just dont care, you may be wrong because they just want you back. They want their mother just like I want my mother, father, sisters, and brothers. I want my family back and I want the tears to stop raining down from my eyes. As I write this I cry for it is true. My mother did drugs and so did my father. All seven of her kids was split up except 4. 2 by 2 was placed in the same home and the others went to the grandmother's home.
True love have always been told that it could be found right around the corner. Women don't keep following this method because truely the wrong type of love would be found around that corner. I thought I found love but I was wrong. I was at my friend because I had to spin the night there. well she had some cousins and her brother there to. Yet let me remind you that her 4 cousins were all boys. As I slept in the room that night (all by myself) some one came in. Till this day I still can't make out his face. But he grabbed me and slung me to the floor. I tried to scream,but he put his hand over my mouth. He ripped my shirt and started kissing my neck and sucking on my breast. I tried to kick but that didn't play out so big. He snatched of my pajamas and ripped the side of them. He unbuttoned his pants and pulled his dick out. I tried to scream,I tried to bite. It was no use so I just layed there HELPLESS. He raped me and it hurted so bad that for almost a week I couldn't move. I couldn't tell anyone, and I felt so bad. I was only twelve. when I got home I tried to tell my so called boyfriend, but he called me a hoe and told some of his guys he screwed me. At that moment I felt so out of place I needed him and he did that. I thought is was true love but everyone is a critic. I'm 14 and I do have true love that comforted me of my past and he makes me feel wanted and love for him is not a word. It is so much more!!!
Reality check! Let it be established that everyone needs one. My reality check doesn't try to crush the feelings of you, but to wake you up. Like number 1. Why do you go with a boy if they don't have the lack of respect to call you? REALITY CHECK: They probably only looking for one thing or mad cuz they ain't get that one thing. REALITY CHECK: YOU NEEDS TO MOVE ON!!!!!!!! Number 2. If some one constantly have something smart to say to you or is just way out of line REALITY CHECK: tell them " it's very interesting on how you're always focused on me and not others" REALITY CHECK will awake them. Look to my sayings and instill them for they can take you places. CUZ REALITY, IT CAN MAKE LIFE SEEM LIKE YOU FUCKED UP BIG TIME!
Not knowing life and it self. Why must I feel as if I had been lied to all my life and accomplished such little of life? Why must a mother have a past not worth remembering? Why must my life include a true mother dying, her real mother crying, and her child trying to figure out why does life take a turn for death? Why must I gather my attentions on my family becoming a family? I'm tired of the life of not knowing the truth. It feels like I have been lied to all my life and it is still continuing. When will it end? When will life be a life worth lving? When will my family accept all of their family even without having the knowledge of knowing them? They say life will go on, but it's hard for that to be true. Make life of the best, but look past the worse. Make a brighter light, but cancel the dim. Forever it will stay lit with or without a cord. For that it will slow down the times of life. Why must teachers feel as if they have to yell? They add on to the noise and drama.Just shut up some times and cancel the cracks. Without cracks, smooth for them, life it self is answered. Why must my heart attach to the strict, but helping? Their hard talk helps me to be strong and independent, depending on my mind and talk to make it through life. Ease your nerves, breathe in, now out. Relax for life will soon end, so make to the fullest having no regrets.
