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Hungry Desire Challenge 21
By firegirl011 on 07/22/2011
Viewed: 231
Reviews: 1
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Written by mwhousemouse  (7/22/2011 2:58:15 PM)

This piece tackles well the complexity in cost existence eternal being the loss of life in living shared. A state perpetual though void of worldly felt emotions.
I thought the quatrains in rhymed couplets a well chosen form. I was, however, confused as to voice - I was not sure of the speaker. Did it move back & forth or was the voice constant throughout the piece? Maybe the problem is me & when I read again I will be able to tell.
rereading with focus on speaker will insure that you have made it clear in your own mind so you can word so the reader understands.
again another reading by me may change my impression.
What do you think?
Michael
A wonderful read, thanks!


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