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BATH WATER
By l0nnieugene on 12/16/2006
Viewed: 500
Reviews: 4
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Written by l0nnieugene  (12/16/2006 8:25:15 PM)

The poem title should have been "Bath Water" not "Bed of Roses."

you can fix that 

No Rating
Written by westcoastmama  (12/17/2006 3:56:14 AM)

click on the title of your poem. When the piece comes up you'll see there is a pencil icon next to the title. Click on that and you can edit the piece and the title =-) ~Mary

Excellent flowing... 


Written by Soulfade the Ghost  (12/17/2006 2:30:40 PM)

lOnnieugene, very very imaginative work. The poetic ability and talent for colorful description is wonderfully apparent. Kudos...
I really like the abstract pairings with the rhyme patterns, makes it expressive...very.

Keep 'em coming

Sincerely,
Soulfade The Ghost

 


Written by Vintaris  (12/18/2006 11:31:26 AM)

Inspirations crossing this poem seems to be Chatroom sex vs Gwen Stefani's "bathwater"

I like the style of it and the poem is excellent

if it were me, I would simply just bold or itailize the "YOUR'S" in the poem, and the 2b or n2 makes me think of LoLZ!!1 or N00b1E and makes the poem slip from my interest.

Keep it up
cheers
bri


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