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The Anxious Friend (Revised)
By Unmanifested_One on 12/09/2007
Viewed: 633
Reviews: 6
Rating:

What a ... 


Written by Sabre  (12/9/2007 6:58:54 AM)

lovely, honest straight from the heart write. Love the alternately repeating third lines. And "a room without her is exile" WOW. The use of the word "would" adds to the anxiety. For who can predict the future?

structure 


Written by rachelle1165  (12/9/2007 10:22:34 AM)

wish i could comment on this poem in a constructive and knowledgeable way...all i know is that it sounds good...i like your choice of words...and i do like it better than your previous attempt.

 


Written by gwizardstar  (12/9/2007 8:22:31 PM)

wow man that is something else. reading that brought a tear to my eye.I'm no soppy get its just I got back wiv my girlfriend and; well it really hit home.loved it bud.keep writing ,merry x-mas n all the best for2008.

 


Written by Biggus  (12/10/2007 8:05:27 AM)


 

No Rating
Written by mmesservey  (12/10/2007 11:36:54 AM)

Excellent work, my friend.

 


Written by anniebel  (3/19/2008 6:05:29 PM)

nice poem. great use of repetition it really has a lively rythm


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