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By YourHumbleNarrator on 05/06/2008
Viewed: 364
Reviews: 2

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Written by juniemoon_  (12/5/2008 12:20:08 AM)

The title in no way helps explain the poem. The first line 'Encapsulating love....simplest of task...
never recovers enough to show love as encapsulated. I find that these 7 lines don't make sense. What were you really trying to say?
Love, so simple, in a verse or a kiss
hold out your hand, I will lead you in this chivarlous delight, red roses beg for a kiss
Why would call love a task? A task is an assignment or job. If you got to work that hard at love then that capsule must be very big.
Junie Moon
On my work I will go back and take another look at it to see what I can do to achieve a better tempo, rhythm and polish. Thanks


Written by Unknown Member  (12/5/2008 12:34:45 PM)

It's amazing that you've put so much into so few words. Wonderful piece :)

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