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By rhythmiccchaoss on 08/15/2011
Viewed: 246
Reviews: 1


Written by Cervantes  (8/22/2011 1:59:59 PM)

I love the first two stanzas. The repetition of the first and last lines is a great driving force here and since they aren't identical it has real appeal to me. I think if you work that angle a little more it could be phenomenal. Not even really continuing that device, because the break from it in the third stanzas makes it stand out more, but with more concrete images in the third stanza. Treasures and secrets leaves a wide interpretation for the reader and it varies between readers too much. Something concrete would really tie this poem together for me. Maybe I'm wrong but the third stanza is the weakest to me.

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